Showing posts with label intimacy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label intimacy. Show all posts

Ain Sakhri Lovers Figurine, by Neil MacGregor

 

BBC Podcast

Wikipedia

This writing belongs to a book called The History of the World in a 100 Objects. It’s the text of a BBC program and it makes reference only to objects that can be found in the British Museum.

As you can infer by the title of the book, it’s a very singular way (and more entertaining) of narrating History. Each chapter has a description of the object and places it in its historical context. The entry also includes a quotation by a specialist.

Our object is a very small statue, a figurine, of a couple making love. It was made 11,000 years ago, at the end of the last Ice Age and at the beginning of the transition to sedentary life and farming, when men started growing wheat and barley and keeping herds. So there was no need for hunting, and people had food surpluses and a bit more time to entertain themselves.

The article comes to say that making love hasn’t changed much in ten thousand years, that our ancestors could have been so sophisticated and so tender as we are today, because in the figurine, you can see not only affection, but also a certain expertise, because perhaps the object could be used as a sex toy. Or perhaps they did know more than us about intimacy (that is sex playing). Perhaps our societies, with their religions and moral codes have prevented us from learning about intimacy, an idea that is different from love, sex and sexual desire.

The cliché says that civilized humans are more tender than animals, that the sexual intercourse among most of animals is almost a sort of raping, that the male is the active part and obtains all the enjoyment, and the female the passive one who enjoys less. 

The film Quest for Fire, by Jean-Jacques Annaud, 1981, makes use of this cliché. The story compares a tribe of neanderthals to a group of homo sapiens. In the film, the Neanderthals are presented as extremely primitive, with minds closer to those of apes than to those of modern humans: they can’t even laugh and there is no sexual love in their tribe, only sex, brutal macho sex, and reproduction. When they come in contact with the Homo sapiens group, they learn, among other things, how to make fire, how to laugh, and how to make love. And the story is set 80,000 years ago. So, according to the film, intimacy is something that can be learned.

In this belief, an experiment was carried out on gorillas at Audubon Zoo in New Orleans in 2004. A male gorilla grown in captivity didn’t understand the courtship signals of the three females whom he lived with. The zoo management wanted the female gorillas to become pregnant in a “natural” way in order to have baby gorillas for the park, but the male was indifferent to the three beauties. So the vets tried to help him by playing some porno gorilla videos, that is, videos where couples of gorillas were mating. But it didn’t work.

There is another film in which we can see the differences between intimacy, sex and sexual love. It’s a very different kind of film: Amantes, directed by Vicente Aranda. Maribel Verdú, in the role of Trini, is Carlos Sanz/Paco’s fiancé. And there is the lover, Luisa, played by Victoria Abril. Trini is a very innocent girl and doesn’t know anything about sex or intimacy; she only loves Paco, and when they have sex, their encounter is rudimentary. Luisa, on the other hand, is an expert in intimacy: she knows how to enjoy these moments and how to make her partner enjoy them too. Paco learns about it and likes it. Couldn’t he have taught Trini? Perhaps he was only a beginner and couldn’t convey his knowledge yet.

 

QUESTIONS

Should this figurine be returned to its original place (if we know it for certain)? And what about all the objects taken from Egypt, Greece, and elsewhere? Should there be an expiration date for restitution claims?

When some people talk about remigration, do they mean also restitution?

Do you think that we have more "humanity" than people from other times or places? Are some cultures more civilized than others?

 

VOCABULARY

chattering, muted, lusher, staple, dwelling


Half a Loaf, by Graham Swift

Half a Loaf, by Glòria Torner

The story has four parts:

PART I. PRESENTATION

The first words we read, “half a loaf”, are the repetition of the title and also the synthesis of all the story.

The narrator is remembering the last lovely night he spent with his girlfriend, called Tanya, and he is imagining how she is returning home alone, as many times, after making love with him. He is thinking that everybody is looking how beautiful his lover is while she is walking along the street and descending to the Tube. He is waiting for the next time he will reach out and touch Tanya.

After that, he describes how important has been for him in his life the religious influence of his strict father, who was a churchman, and also the drastic opinions of her mother wishing him happiness, although she used to say: “all good things must end”.  

PART II. ERIC, THE OSTEOPATH

Now, we know that the narrator, called Eric, is a widower osteopath who has lost his wife, Anthea, three years ago. He describes how sad he felt when his wife died, until he fell into a deep depression. At that time, he only thought about ending his life and thus being with his dead wife.

PART III. TANYA, THE PATIENT

While he was suffering this mental breakdown, he met a new patient, Tanya, a young woman, twenty-six years old. He quickly cured her of a lower back problem and began a love affair with her. Following the story, Eric asked her to have dinner with him and they began a relationship spending since then a night together every week. He sought solace in the company of Tanya, all the while imagining and reconnecting with his dead wife, who encourages him saying “go on”. He can’t disconnect himself from his past.

But Eric has a presentiment: he thinks this love affair will end soon.

Part IV.  NATHAN, THE BOYFRIEND

Following the story, two months later, we clearly notice that Tanya has a regular boyfriend, Nathan. Eric, who isn’t jealous, shares her with her boyfriend. Now, he tries to understand if it’s possible to share his lover with Nathan and not to lose her, although he believes that there will come a time when this love affair will be quite impossible, a real obstacle, like “a stone”. The last words of the story imply that there will not be another night together.

SOME REMARKS

This story is quite different from the others we have read because it’s the first story we read only about love with sensual and sexual feelings.

The story doesn’t follow any linear order from the beginning to the end because Eric, the narrator, wants to mix his memories, thoughts and desires together, until reaching a possible, perhaps uncertain, end.

After reading this sad and conformist story, I finish my work with three questions:

Must he accept less than he wanted? Do you think he wants to share his lover? Or he prefers to finish his affair?

QUESTIONS

-What is the meaning of the title? Is there a pun with the word loaf”?

-“All good things come to an end”. According to your opinion, is this saying true for everything?

-Talk about the narrator: family, job…

-Why do you think the narrator tells us about his father being a churchman?

-“Certain female patients didn’t exactly go to see him for their back problems”: do you think it’s true?

-Describe his love for Tanya.

-Tanya’s decision to bed with him, could be a paraphilia? (Perhaps she was attracted by crying men)

-What you invite someone, what is it best: to go where you like, or to go where you think the other person will like?

-Is there only a kind of love (sexual, not friendship or family love)? How many kinds of love are there? Does love change along the centuries? For example: jealousy. A true love, does it have to be jealous?

Does Tanya love him, or she feels pity? What do you know about the novel Beware of pity, by Stefan Zweig?

-What can you say about Zeppo’s?

-What do you think about Tanya’s morality (she has a boyfriend and gets laid with the narrator)? Have you seen the French film À l’abordage?

-“The young are a mystery, a different species”. What sense is this true in?

-Men “might eventually resort to prostitutes”. Is this a cliché for men? And what about women?

-How do you think their relationship will end?

-What is the stone at the end of the story?

 

VOCABULARY

bay window, ammunition, dwell, unaware, swamp, nonchalantly, on tap, get-out card, balm, rehearsing, arouse, breakdown, sheer, vouched, NHS, blubbering, spectacle, unclad, delude, fee, aegis, doomed, allowance, stray, unprompted, period, crust, bereft, lack, egging me on